Valentine’s Day. For some, the holiday conjures thoughts of love, romance, and desire. For others, it evokes feelings of depression or disgust. Either way, people often feel pretty strongly about Valentine’s Day.

Some people might turn to alcohol or drugs to deal with feelings of loneliness, depression, and disgust. If they’re feeling lonely, people might feel as if they have nothing to lose by overindulging in such substances. They might feel that no one cares about them anyway, so how much can alcohol or drugs really hurt?

But they are doing damage—to themselves. And even though they might not think it, they are also damaging others.

That’s because very few of us are truly isolated from other people. A lighthouse keeper who lives alone on an island and rarely sees people still interacts with people. He or she still has to operate the lighthouse to help others navigate. If this person is drunk or high, they are unable to do their job, which could endanger of the lives of other people who depend on them.

People who think they don’t have anyone in their lives still interact with people in the buildings where they live, at their jobs, at stores they may visit. If they are drunk or high, their interactions may be negative.

Furthermore, lonely people don’t have to stay lonely. But if they abuse drugs or alcohol, they might be intensifying this loneliness. This substance use disorder could be preventing them from finding ways to end this loneliness.

That’s because drug addiction and alcohol abuse waste people’s potential. These phenomena rob people from experiences, from making changes. They treat people poorly and are certainly not a valentine or any other token of affection. Addiction is all about taking, not giving, the exact opposite of the spirit of Valentine’s Day.